TYPTWD

Yesterday was the first ever Take Your Parents to Work Day. I've been working here for ~3.5 years, and being able to open up campus to my folks beyond a good, hearty meal was amazing.

After the day ended, I sent this email to my parents, fondly nicknamed by my team "MaChoi" and "PaChoi" (off of my own nickname/email address "sachoi").

Hi MaChoi and PaChoi,

Thanks for coming to TYPTWD (Take Your Parents to Work Day)! I had a lot of fun giving you a tour around campus, introducing you to my teammates, and showing you a little bit of what I do at work. I hope you had a fun day and are still full from all of the snacks. Enjoy your new mugs, mousepads, and the 1000 photos you took!

I also want to say thanks for being such awesome parents. The speaker today showed a slide with a man jumping in the air and it said, "If you give people freedom, they will amaze you." I think I'm able to do this because you raised me with a lot of freedom and trust. You have always allowed me to be myself and do what I enjoy, and supported me with positive encouragement. You gave me a lot of independence growing up -- dropping me off and picking me up from my friends' houses every weekend, and letting me take $20 from your wallet whenever I needed money (I spent it all on beer and drugs. Just kidding!). You let me decide which school to attend (luckily I chose Berkeley) and travel the world. You didn't force me to play the piano (sorry Mom) and let me live on my own (even though you still don't like it). The only thing you ever said, "NO!" to was getting another ear piercing. But that's not so bad. I knew you trusted me, and that gave me a lot of confidence in myself. Now that I'm an adult, I understand how the way you raised me shaped who I am.

Today reminded me of how you both attended every orchestra concert, open house, Parent-Teacher meeting, Back to School night... Thanks for always being there for me.

Love,
Your daughter, sachoi

Age 25 is gross

Mom (translated from Korean): My kids are turning 25 and 27 this year?! 24 and 26 are OK, but 25... that's gross (징그러)!

When I was a young warthog, I came up with a list of 9 things I wanted to do before I turned 25. Last year, I did a one-year-to-go check in. Time is up, let's see where I landed:

1. Visit Thailand -- FAIL, but not for lack of trying
2. Learn Spanish -- FAIL... for lack of trying
3. Do something, anything! in microfinance or non-profit -- FAIL, I'm a corporate sell-out. But I did start sharetocaresf.org with Helen, which was completely unexpected.
4. Fully and regularly donate 10% of my net income  -- SUCCESS, I don't think it's quite 10%, but it's pretty close
5. Take the GMAT -- FAIL, I think grad school may be out of the picture
6. Be a size 4 again -- FAIL, but at least I didn't go up a size!
7. Commit to a church that I love  -- SUCCESS, City Church SF
8. Live in a different city -- SUCCESS, NYC is my 2nd city
9. Go to the gyno. Not because I want to but because I should.  -- SUCCESS.

Dang, 4 for 9, those are some bad stats. Looking at what I accomplished, they seem to be the foundational things. Thailand, Spanish, MF, and GMAT aren't things that influence my day-to-day. (Except for the size 4 thing -- I need to get my lazy bum to the gym more!) Honestly, I'm surprised. I thought your early 20s were the time for doing wily things. Well, I guess I'll flip it. Early 20s -- ground myself. Late 20s -- go nuts!

Stay tuned for The List: Age 30.

Lent

Ash Wednesday, Lent, Good Friday, Easter Sunday.

For most of my life, these events didn't mean much to me. The church I grew up in didn't celebrate the first two, and the latter was always associated with coloring and finding Easter eggs.

But in the last few years, these four events have held great importance. No, nothing traumatic happened -- actually, the opposite. Life slowed down after college, and with it, my spiritual life. Small habits like journaling, prayer, and reading went to the back burner. I found myself living life and playing, but never finding enough time in the day to get back to those habits.

But when something is important to you, you make time for it. At least, that what I keep telling myself. So for Lent 2012, I am giving up my time.

In the words of Chuck D (pastor at my church):
"As people addicted to comfort and convenience, we're often unaware of how we live to feel good about ourselves, to gain a bit of affirmation, to exert influence, to maximize our own pleasure, to satisfy our immediate needs. Lent invites us to intentionally frustrate ourselves, to engage in a season of deprivation, which actually makes us more aware of the depth of our dependence on any number of things – a substance, our reputation, control, achievement, being right, being comfortable, being secure.

Lent is NOT a behavior modification program. It's not about going off chocolate or caffeine or alcohol. It's about frustrating what Thomas Merton calls our "false self," our illusory self, the part of us addicted to living the lie, a life of hiding."

I spend nearly 3 hours a day sitting on my butt in a moving vehicle. My evenings are often spent finishing work, catching up on my social life, and scouring deal sites and real estate listings. I can give that up for 40 days to get out of my "Live Life" mentality and become uncomfortable being comfortable.

To all you out there observing Lent, I hope that you find yourselves challenged, frustrated, and in the end, closer to God.

Sarah Chois rule the world

In my high school class, I remember there were 6 Sarahs. Sarah on student govt, hot Sarah, athletic Sarah, Sarah something, some other Sarah I didn't know very well, and... me. But back then, I was the only known "Sarah Choi".

In '04, I joined Facebook when it was still in it's infancy. I searched for "Sarah Choi", and with only a handful of colleges in the network, low and behold, there were 5 of us sprawled across America. I friended them all. One messaged back, "Hey! Have we met??" Hmm. Not the brightest of us.

Later that year, as my friend was signing me in at his dorm lobby, he asks, "Hey, did you sign in already?" Scrawled on the last box: "Sarah Choi". My friend yells, "SARAH CHOI!!" and a girl at the elevator whips around. She had graduated just before I started and was visiting a friend.

When Facebook reared its ugly head to the global world, I started getting requests from people I had never met. At first, I would respond back. By now I have stopped responding to all Facebook, LinkedIn, and yes, even Google+ requests for some other "Sarah Choi". I tried, I really did. But there are too many to keep up.

My senior year, we were doing freshman outreach during Welcome Week. Sitting at the table on Sproul, my friend says, "Yo, stop signing yourself in to make our list look longer." But I had not. Later that week, as I traipsed the hallways of Unit 3, I look at a door and written on that piece of construction paper... can you guess? "Sarah Choi". She wasn't home that day, nor did she end up joining our fellowship. Nor did she reply to my welcome to Cal email. Bringing us down, Sarah. Was it because your new friends kept finding me instead of you on Facebook?

When I joined Google, a "Sarah Choi - Finance" started receiving many of my emails. There was even one time she received my postal package (shipped to Mountain View, then to Seoul, then back to Mountain View, then finally to NYC). "Sarah Choi - Finance" is no longer at Google, but now there is a "Sara Choi - YouTube".

A few days ago, I posted some stuff to sell craigslist. Here's one of the replies:

To all you Sarah Chois out there, I hope you share my love for our name as much as you share my actual name.

Share to Care (SF)

We're live! Check out the stories behind Share to Care on our blog, and vote for us on GOOD!

Beware of flash sales

What's a Motto with you?

After a recent bout of SaranWrap sayings, I realized have a few mottos that I seem to tout often myself. Here are the mantras of my life and what the heck I'm trying to say:

Everything in moderation.
Too much of anything is bad for you. Candy, work, play, love... even water. (Seriously, you can die from drinking too much water.) So I try not to live too much in the extremes.  My life is pretty mellow. I let my friends fill that void with their drama ;).

Don't complain unless you're going to do something about it.
Clarification: complaining isn't the same as venting. By all means, vent away -- everyone needs to do that. But at some point, you're not angry anymore, you're just complaining. And that's when you have to do something about it. Easier said than done, I know. But complaining about your problem isn't going to help. It's also hard for me to watch someone who is unhappy stay unhappy because they won't do anything to change their circumstances. I have a bias toward action, so if I feel like something is awry, I want to fix it.

Open mind, open heart, empty stomach... closed legs.

This applies to dating, specifically online dating. As my friends started dipping their toes in the online dating scene, I started encouraging them to take chances with strangers. You can't really judge someone based on their thumbnail picture and beefed up profile. So go on the date, and:

• Keep an open mind that your perfect man/woman may not be what you think. 
• Have an open heart and break down any walls that are preventing you from being honest and earnest. 
• Make sure you have an empty stomach because if you are going on a date, you're probably going to eat dinner. Food bonds people. 
• The last part is due to Clayton butchering my phrase. Keep those legs closed until date #100!

90% of drama is due to misunderstandings
No wonder our group name is SaranWrap. We've stuck together though some serious issues, or at least many spats between individuals. I've done scientific research with a double blind experiment and some statistical modeling to prove that 90% of these issues are due to simple misunderstandings. He said, she said, you said, I said... Things just get lost in translation. Most people, especially your friends, have good intentions. So next time you feel angry toward or hurt by a friend, take the time to calm down and clarify what they meant to say. It saves a lot of ill will, awkwardness, and anxiety.

Live life
You have two options: 1) swing on the rope and jump into the cold lake, or 2) just watch other people do it. Pick option 1. You'll have way more fun, promise.
Hydrate before you dominate.
The first sign of dehydration is chapped lips. Drink lots of water. But don't over-hydrate, see motto #1.